20 Things We're Doing In Our Cubicles

1. Listening for footsteps. 
2. Ordering tickets to that thing on that day that we’re going to call in sick.
3. Staring blankly at Outlook while praying for Armageddon.
4. Synchronizing our menstrual cycles. 
5. Deleting our Google Toolbar search histories one letter at a time. 
6. Researching World War II on Wikipedia, followed by the lyrics to Thrift Shop. 
7. Accidentally sipping yesterday’s cup of coffee. 
8. Making fun of the company website.
9. Starting up a new colony of bacteria on our keyboards.
10. Wondering if it’s too soon to go pee again. 
11. Losing muscle mass.
12. Realizing that all of the 6-digit project numbers we’ve memorized have replaced all of the phone numbers we used to know.
13. Staring wistfully at our empty water cup.
14. Shoving keys, wallet, and phone into waistband of skirt and sneaking out for coffee, leaving purse behind as decoy.  
15. Re-writing the final episode of Family Ties.
16. Looking up everybody we’ve ever known on LinkedIn because it’s the only social networking site that’s not blocked. 
17. Finally getting around to Googling “proper way to slice an onion.” 
18. Wondering what that smell is. 
19. Deleting email from Classmates.com.
20. This.

The Secret is Out

I've figured out who the model was for the Outlook "add contact photo" template:

Snow!!!!!!!!!!!!

Way to go Weather.com.  Love the red alarmist color scheme and how the entire East coast is being engulfed in flames.  Virginia and West Virginia are pretty much drowning in a giant puddle of blood.

First Nemo, now Saturn?  These names seriously suck.  Obviously Weather.com wants to scare the living daylights out of everybody, so I'm surprised they keep going with such wimpy names. They need something that portrays misery and our impending doom - like using a list of serial killer names. I bet Winter Storm Jeffrey Dahmer would keep plenty of people off the roads.  Plus they could make cool analogies like "This storm is going to slice through New England like...." And then they could fill in the blank with any number of disturbing images.  That's right, Weather.com, I'm available for part-time employment.  Don't be shy.

Weekly BK Sign Roundup

Here's a couple of doozies from the past few weeks.  The first one I'm not even sure what it says. ANDTAS CHEESET OTS UTAREBACK is what it looks like to me.  And then we have the second one boasting about a delicious cup of cold coffee for 25 cents.  I'll assume that the letters needed to spell the word "iced" were lost in the shrubs and so they had to just do their best.  And as we know, BK's best is just terrible.

When life gets you down...

Just be glad you're not this woman:

You're feeling pretty good about yourself now, right?  You're welcome.

Gotta liven things up somehow...

If you've ever worked for a crazy old person...

What Did I Expect?

I know that when you eat at Burger King you shouldn't expect too much.  That not only goes for the food, but also for the toys you get with the kid's meal.  Usually your kid plays with it a few times, and then you sneak it into the trash while they're sleeping.  But this one really bugged me.

Here it is....a Connect 4 game!  It came in such a big box that it didn't even fit inside the kid's meal box, making it even more exciting.  In the corner it even says "Family Game Night."  Oh boy!  Good thing it's a Saturday....

The back even makes it look like a normal game of Connect 4.  Note the arrows making it look like you have to drop the pieces down into the slots.

Aaaaand, here's what it really looks like:

You have to actually stick each circle into each crappy plastic slot.  There is no drop down action.   Isn't the whole point of Connect 4 that you drop your piece down from the top and into the next available slot?  There isn't a single kid who's going to play this after they open the box and discover how much it sucks.  The back of the box also mentions that Twister is a trademark of Hasbro...I'm guessing Twister is another game they're giving out.  I can only imagine. It's probably one square foot with one green circle on it.